Simple Twists of Fate
by Lady Kiddymonster
Summary: Author note: This fic is my STEAMM Day contribution. Be warned that it plays havoc with the sequence of events in the 2012 CS. An unexpected incident at the shoot brings the Crawley sisters and their ships together.
1. Chapter 1 An Unexpected visit

**Simple Twists of Fate**

**Author note: This fic is my STEAMM Day contribution. Be warned that it plays havoc with the sequence of events in the 2012 CS.**

**December 1919.**

The day of the shoot dawned cold and foggy. Lady Edith Crawley sighed deeply as she left the dining room after breakfast. She had not felt like eating much. She was deeply disappointed after the previous evening when her father, Lord Grantham, had told her that he had offered Sir Anthony Strallan three dates to come over but he had said no to all of them. He had been so keen on shooting and gentlemanly sports before the war, but Edith suspected that perhaps he had had enough of shooting, especially when the previous few years had meant that pointing guns at people had been with the intention of killing.

Edith had been relieved to know that Sir Anthony had survived the war. She wondered if she would have a chance to sneak out and drive over to Locksley to see him. No one ever noticed her anyway, so they would hardly miss her for a few hours.

Her sister, Sybil, had come over from Ireland with her husband, Tom Branson, Lord Grantham's former chauffeur, and Edith felt the tension in the air. Tom had no real interest in shooting either but had agreed to have a go. Edith did not really relish the prospect of being anywhere near her sister, Mary's fiancé, Sir Richard Carlisle, whom she actively despised. She sensed the tension between Carlisle and Matthew. Carlisle envied Matthew, in fact he was actively jealous of him because of the hold he believed he still held on Mary. Edith did not know then that Carlisle had a far more sinister hold over Mary; he would expose her ill-advised pre-war liaison with Turkish diplomat Carlisle Pamuk if she did not marry him. Edith sensed that the fact that her father's valet, John Bates, was awaiting trial for murder had remained out of the public domain, owing to Carlisle's influence. Edith knew that Matthew and Mary still loved each other. She had caught Mary about to pray for Matthew during the war.

Edith knew that she loved Sir Anthony Strallan; in fact she had done since their brief courtship before the war. They had gotten on well, shared so many tastes and interests and he treated her like an adult, not the child she had then been. Edith had grown up during the war and been told she was a lot nicer. She had kept busy because any idle moment had caused her to worry fiercely for Sir Anthony's safety. Her father had told her only that he was doing highly sensitive work, and that she had been told only under duress. She knew her father found Sir Anthony dull as paint and much too old for her. If Anthony _had _proposed to her on the day of the garden party, as she had believed was his intention before Mary had stuck her oar in, then she would have needed her father's consent. Now she was free to give her own.

Violet joined Edith at the window where she was looking out over the fog shrouded lawn.

Edith accepted Violet's arrival with a nod, but neither of them spoke.

Edith started as she noticed a semi-familiar car wind its way down the long drive. But it was chauffeur driven. Sir Anthony did not use a chauffeur She hoped that the disappointment was not obvious.

But wait. It was Sir Anthony getting out. Her breath caught in her throat. There was no mistaking that tall, slightly stooped stature and the long graceful legs.

"He never used to use a chauffeur." was all Violet said. But Edith had run from the room and was rushing downstairs, her cheeks pink with elation.

She arrived in the hallway, just as Carson was greeting Sir Anthony. Anthony looked at her, trying to ignore the fact his heart was pounding at the very sight of her. His heart was pounding and the hairs on the back of his neck bristling.

"Lady Edith, it's been far too long." He smiled and that lopsided grin of his melted her heart once again.

"It's nice to see you," she breathed, "It's nice to see all our friends who made it through unscathed."

"I'm afraid I haven't," he said gently and she realised that his right arm was encased in a sling and the hand looked withered and useless. She fought to keep tears back. What on earth had happened?

"I took a bullet in the wrong place, which seems to have knocked out my right arm." He said.

"Not forever surely." She gasped.

"Well the upshot is the wretched thing is no use to man or beast."

Just then Sir Richard Carlisle came by, closely followed by Mary and Matthew.

"You're a bit late my friend," Sir Richard quipped, seeing Anthony's injured arm, "Downton ceased to be a military hospital earlier this year."

"Trust me, I am still probably a better shot than you are with two good arms."

Edith was immensely proud of him for saying this and her hatred for Carlisle boiled and seethed beneath the surface.

Edith did not miss the pitying look on Mary's face, but she also detected a softness, an almost apologetic look beneath the scorn.

Carlisle went on outside and Edith smirked at his back.

"What on earth does Mary see in him?" she murmured under her breath, but Anthony heard her.

Just being in the same room as Anthony Strallan was beginning to reawaken her own thwarted romantic hopes and broken dreams. She took his injured hand in hers and caressed it gently. Anthony blinked back tears from his own beautiful blue eyes.

"Edith," he whispered, "Will you come to Locksley for tea tomorrow? Only I need to talk to you, about things I dare not utter here."

"Yes of course," she whispered, trying to ignore the pounding of her heart at his nearness.

As yet neither of them, or the assembled shooting party, had any indication that that day things would be irrevocably changed.


	2. Chapter 2 A Shooting Accident

**Chapter 2**

**Okay, I know Tom & Sybil were not in the 2012 CS but this is AU so anything goes right?**

"Are you sure you want to join the shoot?" Edith had gently led Anthony into the library where they had a chance of more privacy.

"I may be maimed and physically disadvantaged, Lady Edith," he murmured softly into her ear, the sensation of his warmth breath making her shiver, "But that makes me no less of a gentleman, all the more so since I suspect that Sir Richard Carlisle did not risk death and dismemberment in the service of King and Country."

"You know who he is?" Edith was surprised.

"Yes, and I despise the man for what he represents. I will tell you more later, and for the moment I shall let his slight against me go."

"Edith," They were disrupted by the sound of Lord Grantham's voice.

"Oh Papa," Edith said. "Sir Anthony has made it after all."

"So I see," There was no warmth in Robert's voice and that chilled Edith. He approached them.

"Will you be alright, dear chap?"

"I may not be able to load a rifle, Lord Grantham, but I am a pretty good shot with this." He drew out a service revolver, "Why should I miss out?"

"Quite. I am sure Edith will help you if she can." He left the room.

Edith sensed that her father was somewhat embarrassed. He had wanted to serve, but ended up a pointless regimental mascot. She made up her mind she would try and smooth things over later. She had no idea exactly what Sir Anthony wished to discuss with her in private, but for now she entertained hopes and her stomach felt like a horde of butterflies had been released inside her.

Edith listened carefully as Anthony took out a box of ammunition and talked her through loading and reloading the revolver.

They went outside to join the shooting party. The chill damp of the fog made Edith shiver and Anthony put his arm around her shoulders. Edith smiled broadly. Edith was well aware of tension between Matthew, Carlisle and Mary, especially when Mary aid that she had agreed to accompany Matthew on the first drive. Carlisle tensed, his body rigid, and Edith sensed trouble ahead.

The party moved off and pretty soon the air was filled with the smoke and loud bangs of shots.

"I've never been able to work out what's worse," Mary said, "The sorrow when you hit the bird or the shame when you miss it."

"Well, as long as you agree to lie when anyone asks how I did." Matthew chuckled. "I'm hopeless at this."

Anthony was doing rather well, despite his physical disadvantage. Edith was so proud of him. It was impossible to talk at the shoot though, because of the noise and the need to concentrate.

In the distance Edith could hear raised voices.

"Why were you laughing with Matthew back there?"

"I would imagine he said something funny,"

"Am I never to be free of him?"

"Of course not, you know how families like mine work, and he is my father's heir."

"I see even Lady Edith has a man in close attendance today."

"Sir Anthony Strallan? They courted a bit before the war. My mother had high hopes for he and I, well after what happened with Mr Pamuk," Mary pulled a face and the light momentarily went out of her eyes at the memory "But he preferred Edith and to be honest I was glad. Had war not broken out I think they would have married."

Edith noticed that Mary said nothing about _why_ Sir Anthony had been prevented from proposing to her at the Garden party and she was glad.

"Lavinia knew Matthew never loved her." Carlisle taunted.

Mary did not say anything, but right now she wanted to be as far away from Carlisle as it was possible to be.

"You know how it is, Richard," Mary placed her hand on his arm in an attempt to placate him.

"I know your family look down on me because I wasn't born with the proverbial silver spoon in my mouth." He said savagely, "But I have had to work damned hard to get what I want in life. What I want is you, Mary. I want for you and me to marry and live at Haxby Park, without your grandmother expressing disapproval every five minutes. I don't want any of them around me."

"I wish you could get past all that," Mary sighed, rolling her eyes upwards.

"I might be able to, if I could believe for one moment you preferred my company to his." Carlisle snapped.

"Things don't sound rosy there." Anthony commented.

"I agree and, after she tried to spoil things for us, maybe I should not be sympathetic," Edith replied, "But I really do not want that man as a brother-in-law."

They heard Matthew wade in, and they heard Richard sigh audibly.

"What seems to be the trouble?" Matthew asked.

"Richard's loader seems to have gotten lost," Mary replied, "this is the best drive and he's missing all the fun."

Then the mist descended and, for a moment, there was an eerily oppressive silence, punctuated by a single loud shot, which seemed to reverberate through both open space and woodland. The shot was followed by a piercing scream.

Anthony pulled Edith to him with his good arm and she held him tightly. It felt good to be so near him, but one or both of them needed to break that spell. They needed to investigate.

Edith and Anthony made their way through the wet grass in the direction of the shot; acutely aware of other footsteps headed the same direction.

A figure lay face down in the wet grass and, judging by the frozen look of horror on Mary's ashen face, they could see that it was Matthew.


	3. Chapter 3 Sir Anthony takes charge

**Chapter 3**

**Anthony decides to be a bad-arse baronet in this chapter. But then Sir Richard Carlisle does have that effect on some people.**

Edith put her arms around Mary, who was sobbing. She led her sister gently to one side.

"What happened?" she asked.

"Sir Richard was moaning about never being rid of Matthew and he made some reference to my past," Mary was aware that Anthony did not know about the Kamal Pamuk scandal so she erred on the side of caution, unable to vouch for Anthony's discretion.

"And then what happened, Lady Mary?" Anthony asked, fixing Richard hard with a glare that would have curdled milk.

"He shot Matthew, insists it was an accident but I know different."

"The burden of proof is on you, Mary," Carlisle said coldly, "You have to prove intent."

Matthew, lying in the mud, began to moan and then let out a scream as he moved. For a brief moment Anthony was frozen in time, paralysed by recall of his own injury and the moments after he had sustained it. He prayed that it would not be the same for Matthew, for he was a young man. The scream tore through them and Edith cradled Mary, whose body was tensed rigid with sobs.

Anthony crouched in the mud beside Matthew but did not take his gaze from Carlisle.

He gently moved him and felt his shoulder with his good hand. He was aware of Matthew's warm blood seeping through his clothing.

"Edith. go and find your father. Tell him what has happened and have him send for both Dr Clarkson and the police."

"No, I'll go." Mary dabbed at her eyes, "I want to be as far away from that," she jerked her head towards Carlisle, "as I can."

"Well, someone needs to go, and quickly." Anthony snapped.

Mary ran off through the trees in the direction of Downton Abbey. Edith crouched down and removed her shawl, with which she tried to bind Matthew's shoulder.

Anthony moved towards Carlisle, pointing his service revolver at him. He kept going until Carlisle was backed against a tree. Anthony was a good few inches taller. He pressed the cold muzzle of the weapon against Carlisle's throat. They both heard a hiss as Carlisle inhaled sharply. Sir Richard's gun was in the grass and Anthony kicked it away from him.

"I won't shoot you Carlisle, because it would be an inherent waste of ammunition."

"I never did tell you Lady Strallan's dirty little secret did I?"

"Lady Strallan has been dead these last ten years," Anthony said, "Anyway, I know she had a fling with Viscount Henley, that really is no secret and it was before we married anyway."

"But you don't know about Lady Mary's dirty little indiscretion." Carlisle taunted.

"It would make not a bit of difference to me if I did know," Anthony said coolly.

"But Sir Lancelot here doesn't know," Carlisle retorted, "I would be free of him if he did know, because he would not touch her.

Anthony was no fan of Mary's but he felt for her and sensed that something beyond his comprehension held her to this snivelling weasel before him. He had read of Mary's engagement to Carlisle in the society press. Mary left him cold but Anthony was a gentleman and hated men who blackmailed women by holding past indiscretions against them. He despised the double standards of the times in which they lived. He had to admit his reasons for his current behaviour were not entirely altruistic. He knew that Mary was Lord Grantham's favourite and if he could get rid of Carlisle, help Mary and save Matthew then it might earn him valid points when it came to Edith.

He had decided that he wanted Edith. He was going to prove to her family that he was good enough for her; although he sensed that he already held her heart in the palm of his good hand, metaphorically speaking at least.

"Anthony, Matthew's losing more blood than I can stop!" Edith wailed. She took off her coat and wrapped that around him as well.

"Do the best you can, Edith." he said, wanting to put his good arm around her and hold her close to his warm body with every fibre of his being.

Carlisle stood there smirking as both Edith and Anthony were possessed with a fervent desire to wipe that smug look off his face. Permanently.


	4. Chapter 4 Truth hurts

**Chapter 4**

"I'll never get the hang of this," Tom Branson sighed. "I bet Sir Anthony Strallan has hit more than me and he's only got one working arm and a service revolver."

Sybil kissed him.

"I'm proud of you because you tried, Tom. You took part and in so many ways that's far more important."

"You're right of course, Sybil darling." Tom finished reloading and was about to get started again when Mary came rushing up to them, her pale face streaked with tears.

"Mary, whatever is wrong?" Sybil gasped. Tom lowered the rifle.

"Richard has shot Matthew. I'm looking for Papa, so he can get Dr Clarkson and the police."

"Carlisle will have made a run for it by now." Tom said, shouldering the rifle, after making sure the safety catch was on.

"No, Edith and Sir Anthony are with them. I bet Sir Anthony can do a better job of keeping him in check with one arm than most men can with two. Edith will be able to look after Matthew."

Mary's breathing was ragged and her pale cheeks were spotted with red, after the exertion of running. Sybil put her arms around her sister.

"I think I heard Lord Grantham a few minutes ago, Mary." Tom said, "Do you want me to run and see if I can find him?"

"That would be very helpful, Tom." Mary said.

Tom ran off.

"Oh Sybil, it was awful." Mary wept. "Richard threatened to spill the beans about my er indiscretion. God knows what Sir Anthony must have thought. I always said I would tell Matthew, but I did not want him to find out like this. I wish I had never set eyes on the man."

"Who? Sir Richard Carlisle, or Kamal Pamuk?" Sybil asked.

"Both of them." Mary said. "I'll tell you another thing. I think Edith loves Sir Anthony, and I wrecked that too."

"How do you mean?" Sybil was confused, because she had no idea what had happened at the garden party, or about Edith's letter to the Turkish Ambassador.

Mary was about to explain when her father arrived with Tom.

"Mary, what on earth has happened?" Robert gasped. "Tom has just told me that Carlisle has shot Matthew."

"I would go quickly, Papa." Sybil said, in an effort to diffuse the tension, "I'll come too, I might be able to help with Matthew."

"No Sybil." Tom said, "I'm not having my pregnant wife anywhere near a man who has shot someone in cold blood."

"Tom's right, Sybil." Mary said.

"Well, I'm coming anyway." Sybil folded her arms.

Realising that she would not back down, Tom sighed, and reluctantly allowed her to follow them. Sybil kept her arm around Mary.

"What on earth is going on here?" Robert demanded as they strode into the clearing. Anthony was still holding Richard to ransom with his revolver, while Edith fought valiantly to stop the bleeding from Matthew's gunshot wound. Moments later Dr Richard Clarkson arrived with an armed police officer and two Special Constables.

"Come with us Sir." One of the specials addressed Carlisle whilst non verbally signalling to Anthony to take a step back.

"What the hell do you think you are playing at, Carlisle?" Robert raged.

"How smooth you are, Lord Grantham." Carlisle said, coolly. "While your precious heir lies there, bleeding like a stuck pig."

"That will do, sir." The other Special Constable said.

"I'm not done with you yet, Lord Grantham." Carlisle seethed as handcuffs were slipped on his wrist.

"Sir Richard Carlisle, I am arresting you for the unlawful and deliberate wounding of Mr Matthew Crawley. You do not have to say anything, but anything you do say will be taken down in writing and given in evidence against you."

"Try keeping that out of the press." Anthony said calmly.

"Why?" Robert asked Carlisle.

"Lord Grantham, you do realise that the death of a certain Turkish diplomat in your home was not as it appeared to be?" Carlisle said coldly.

"Richard, must we do this now?" Mary was shaking.

"Must we do what now?" Robert asked.

"Mr Kamal Pamuk's corpse was carried across the house at dead of night," Carlisle said, "Because he died in Lady Mary's bed. Your own wife was complicit in this deception, Lord Grantham. That is why she tried to fix up a match between Mary and Sir Anthony here. Still, I expect you are glad that did not come off. A man with only one working arm would be a pretty poor advert for the house of Grantham, but since you seem incapable of producing sons."

Robert had turned pale. Mary was hoping that Matthew could not hear the exchange but the contorted look of pain on his face showed all too clearly that he had heard every word.

Richard walked away, handcuffed to the Special Constables, but the look he gave as he looked back was one of pure malevolent spite and hatred.

"I did what I could to stop the bleeding, Dr Clarkson." Edith said, moving aside so that Clarkson could get to his patient.

"You have done very well, Lady Edith, with what limited resources you had." Clarkson praised. "Well done also for not moving him, as that could well have made it worse."

Anthony wished with all his heart that Edith had been there when he had been shot.

"I think we all need to get inside in the warm." Robert said, "Edith will need a change of clothes, and there are things I have to know."

He turned to Anthony.

"I underestimated you, Anthony old chap." he said, offering his left hand, which Anthony shook firmly yet awkwardly. "Let's go and have a stiff drink, I know I need one."


	5. Chapter 5 A family conference

**Chapter 5**

A few more of the shooting party had arrived on the scene by this time. Clarkson enlisted the help of two of the men in getting Matthew onto a makeshift stretcher.

"I'm going with him." Mary said.

"Yes, you go Mary." Robert said, "Cousin Isobel may need your emotional support, but don't think for one minute I will let certain matters drop."

"I know, Papa." Mary sighed.

"I may need your help too, Lady Sybil." Clarkson said.

"Of course, Dr Clarkson." Sybil said. She kissed Tom. "You go back with Papa and Edith, I'll join you as soon as I know what's happening."

The party left.

"Do you think Matthew will be alright?" Edith whispered to Anthony. She was shivering now, having used both her coat and shawl to try and prevent Matthew from bleeding to death. Anthony badly wanted to give her his own coat, but his valet was not there to help him undress and he was too proud to ask anyone for help. But Tom sensed.

"I can help you, Sir Anthony." He said, "If you tell me how."

Edith smiled and folded her arms across herself to keep out the cold. She was pale and Robert was really quite worried about her. She was covered with blood, but he drew some comfort in knowing it was not hers.

Anthony instructed Tom in how to remove his sling and to ease his coat off his injured arm. Tom wrapped the coat around Edith, who smiled gratefully at them both.

"Do you think Matthew will be able to move his arm?" Tom asked.

Anthony shrugged. "I would not like to speculate, let's just say it has brought back some less than pleasant memories for me."

Edith put her arm around Anthony, shocked by the growing intensity of her feelings for him. Her head was spinning, it had been one hell of a day and there was a lot to take in. Edith did not envy Mary, having to tell their father the truth about Mr Pamuk. She was sorry that he and Matthew had had to find out at all, much less in the way that they had.

"Good grief!" Cora explained as Edith, Robert, Tom and Anthony walked into the library. Violet turned pale at the sight of her granddaughter covered with Matthew's blood.

"What on earth!" Violet exclaimed, "You weren't meant to be shooting one another you know."

"Matthew has been shot." Robert replied, as he instructed Carson to pour string drinks for himself, Anthony, Edith and Tom.

"I don't like spirits." Edith murmured.

"It will help you." Anthony said,

"Carson, please will you ask Anna to run a hot bath for Lady Edith?" Robert asked.

"Of course, My Lord." Carson departed.

Anna came to fetch Edith and the intense gaze that passed between her and Anthony as she left the room left Cora in no doubt as to one thing. Her second, often overlooked daughter, loved this gentle man.

OO

"What on earth happened, my Lady?" Anna gasped as she helped Edith undress and get into the hot water. "I know it's probably none of my business."

"I'll tell you, but you must keep it to yourself." Edith said, shivering.

Anna listened, wide-eyed, as Edith told her everything.

"You mean Lady Mary was only going to marry Sir Richard so that the Pamuk thing stayed quiet?"

"It looks that way," Edith said, "She certainly doesn't love him."

"What a horrible position to be in!" Anna exclaimed.

"I know." Edith said, "Unfortunately, this means that soon the papers are going to be filled with yours and Mr Bates' story too. It's been kept out, but Sir Richard will have no qualms about keeping quiet now."

"We will face it, My Lady." Anna said, "Anyway, from what I have heard, bad publicity is better than none at all. It might even provoke someone who, up until this time, does not realise that they know something, to come forward."

"I really hope it does work that way, Anna." Edith said, "You know that none of us believe he is guilty."

Edith was feeling warmer now and she washed herself thoroughly.

"Anna, will you put out the jade green dress? I want to look nice for Sir Anthony. I was just so proud of him today. In fact I've made up my mind. I love him and I won't let him walk away a second time."

"He's worth ten of Sir Richard Carlisle, my lady." Anna said.

OO

Cora, Violet and Tom listened as Robert filled them in on the events of the shoot.

Anthony gave them an account too.

"It sounds like you distinguished yourself rather well, Sir Anthony." Violet said.

"I did only what any gentleman would have done, Lady Grantham." Anthony protested.

"Rubbish, you were a hero." Tom said, "Don't you agree, Lord Grantham?"

"Yes, I'm rather inclined to agree with you, Tom." Robert said.

"Well, I may need help to give a lady my coat," Anthony said, "And I may not be able to shake your hand in the traditional way, but I can handle a revolver. Of course being a good bit taller and older than Carlisle helped as well."

"Cora, is it true about Mr Pamuk, dying in Mary's bed?" Robert asked.

"Yes, I'm afraid it is Robert. But nothing can be done to change that now." Cora said. She turned to Anthony.

"I really am so sorry, Sir Anthony. If you feel like I used you."

"If you had not, Lady Grantham, then I would never have met Lady Edith. I carried her photo throughout the war, and whenever I felt like it was all hopeless, then I would look at it and somehow she gave me the strength of spirit to fight through another day. Especially after I got this," he indicated his arm, which was now back in its sling.

There was a silence for a moment and Anthony was aware that Matthew must now be facing the same uncertainties.

"If Matthew faces the same then I hope you will permit me to help him. I am in a better position than most to help him come to terms with such an injury."

"Of course you must," Violet said, "Most of us will never have a clue as to what those men who risked life and limb for our King and country must face on a daily basis."

"What are your intentions towards Edith?" Robert asked.

Anthony swallowed, knowing he must make a good job of this because it may be the only chance he would ever get.


	6. Chapter 6 Facing reality

**Chapter 6**

**A brief respite from the emotional turmoil at Downton while we find out Matthew's fate.**

Mrs Isobel Crawley was absolutely distraught when Matthew was brought in. Sybil bustled around and made her and Mary some strong tea.

"I'm sure everything will be fine, cousin Isobel." Sybil soothed, "After all, a few short months ago we didn't think Matthew would ever stand or walk again."

"Lady Sybil, I need your help." Clarkson called.

"Coming!" Sybil called.

Isobel listened tearfully while Mary told her everything, including her shameful indiscretion.

"I deeply regret that, cousin Isobel. It was a moment of fevered lust, of excitement but I have paid the price many times over. Losing Matthew to Lavinia and then being effectively held to ransom by Carlisle. I would have told Matthew one day, but I never meant for him to find out like that, or my father." Mary wiped her eyes on her sleeve.

"What's done is done, Mary dear." Isobel said kindly. "I always sensed there was something that you were not entirely honest about."

"Matthew will never want me now." Mary sobbed, "And in truth I never stopped loving him."

"I know, Mary." Isobel said gently.

"He will despise me, and rightly so," Mary said, her voice strained.

"You are far from being the first lady in your position to have made such a mistake, or to find herself in such a position later on." Isobel said, "I'm afraid the world is full of unscrupulous men who exploit things like that for personal gain. I believe Sir Richard had something on Lavinia too, although I don't know what."

"My mother had managed to keep it from my father, but now he knows and he must be so disappointed in me. That's why Mama invited Sir Anthony Strallan over; she was hoping he would rescue me but he fell in love with Edith instead and," Mary swallowed," I'm afraid I rather spoilt things."

She painfully told Isobel about the letter Edith had written to the Turkish ambassador and how she had retaliated by saying what she had at the garden party. "So Anthony went off to the war, believing a lie, and now he is injured. He never believed he was good enough for any of us Crawley girls. He's a nice man, although not exactly exciting. I have a lot of apologies to make and I hope Mrs Patmore has a good humble pie recipe, because I'm going to need to eat lots of it."

Isobel hugged Mary.

"I don't think any less of you, Mary. It takes a lot of guts to admit that you have made a mistake."

"Thank you." Mary said.

Two hours later Dr Clarkson had cleaned Matthew's wound and removed the bullet from his left shoulder. Matthew was coming round from the chloroform and clearly in pain. It was a mirror image to Anthony's wound, given that it was on the opposite side leaving Matthew use of his right arm and hand but not his left.

"Is it bad?" Sybil asked.

"Well, I'm guessing it was at close range so his shoulder blade and nerves are shattered. I have repaired the damage as best I can, but I will seek a second opinion. At least Carlisle is in custody. Anthony Strallan does not know who shot him."

"I don't know what would be worse." Sybil said.

"You should go home to Downton and get some rest." Clarkson said, "Matthew should sleep through the night, given the laudanum dose I have given him."

He went into the room where Mary and Isobel were dozing, the mugs of tea on the table had long since gone cold.

They both stirred when they heard Clarkson come in.

"Will he be alright?" Mary breathed.

"I have cleaned the wound and removed the bullet. It did a great deal of damage to the shoulder blade and nerve endings on his left side..I have repaired it best I can and he is now sleeping. I have given him laudanum and will be here all night, just in case he wakes."

"Will he be able to move or use his arm?" Isobel asked.

"I don't know yet," Clarkson said, "But such an injury is possible to manage, Sir Anthony Strallan is living proof of that; albeit the fact that Sir Anthony's right arm is affected, not his left."

"I'd like to stay here." Isobel said.

"I'll go home." Mary said, "I have a lot of talking to do." She swallowed.


	7. Chapter 7 Sir Anthony declares his heart

**Chapter 7**

Anna styled Edith's hair. She was dressed in a jade green dress.

"Good luck, my lady," Anna said, "Sir Anthony is a lovely man."

"I know." Edith said.

OO

Anthony was answering Robert's question as to his intentions towards Edith.

"When I courted Edith, before the war," Anthony swallowed, "Well she was so alive, and we got on so well. She gave me hope and I would have proposed to her the day of the garden party. But I was aware then, Lord Grantham, that Edith would have required your consent and I was not altogether confident I would ever get that, being as I was so much older than she. I still am, and now I am not whole. I never thought I was good enough for her, for any of your daughters. But I love Edith and, if she would consent, then I have the means to provide for her. I may need help to dress, but I can manage pretty well with just one arm. I will be able to help Matthew as well, if this is what he must face."

Edith was hovering in the doorway; she had not made her presence known. Her heart fluttered as she heard him say that he loved her.

But Violet had seen her shadow.

"Come in, Edith dear."

Anthony froze. So she was back. In moments she was beside him.

Anthony put his good arm around her.

"Lord Grantham, your daughter means everything to me. Thoughts of her kept me strong during the darkest days of my life and, even when I came home, I had hopes; although I fully expected her to have found someone else and married. I never gave her a reason to wait for me. But as the reality of my situation set in, the fact that I was maimed, I despaired of thinking I would ever be good enough for her. I came here today with the intention of showing her my scars and giving her the choice, even if it meant never seeing her again. But as a result of what has happened today, well I want to be with her, if she'll have me."

"Edith, what do you want?" Violet asked, "Your father and I have too long neglected you, and what you want. We failed to notice that you grew up during the war and are a young woman with opinions and feelings of your own."

Edith took Anthony's injured hand in hers, caressing it lightly with her soft lips.

"I want to be with you, Anthony," she said simply, "I think I have loved you ever since we first met. I was just so proud of you today. I often thought of you during the war, dreaded hearing that you had been killed, because I don't think my heart could have stood it. I know I can learn to help you and you more than proved yourself today. We can also help Matthew, if this is what he faces."

"Of course we will give Matthew all the support he needs," Cora said.

The shooting party had pretty much broken up and most guests had declined the lunch, sensing that the family had enough drama to be going on with. Carson and Anna were transferring plates of food to the dining room.

"Would you like to stay for lunch, Sir Anthony?" Cora asked.

"I would be delighted, Lady Grantham," Anthony said, "I'm afraid I skipped breakfast so I'm famished."

Anthony stayed for lunch; Robert and Violet let them be.

"You have truly given me back my life, Lady Edith." he whispered to her.

"Richard Carlisle has nothing on me by the way." She whispered.

"I'm glad to hear it, although I despise men who exert a hold on women in that way. Surely we should be moving on from the old Tess of the D'Urbervilles double standards? Especially now that we have been through a war where women have had to function in traditional men's roles to keep the country going."

"Did he have something on the late Lady Strallan?"

"He heard a rumour about some letters Maud had written to a young man in her youth, but Maud had told me about them. So he could not damage either of us, but I knew of him and what he was about. Lady Mary is well rid of him."

"I learnt to drive during the war," Edith said, "So if you want to go out anytime I would be happy to take you."

"That would be very nice," he said, "Edith, may I kiss you?"

"Yes," she whispered.

He drew her close to him and his mouth gently claimed hers, exploring her gently and she felt herself respond to him, as though a fire had been lit beneath her. They were both trembling when he drew back.

"Edith, that was the most gentle, most loving kiss I have ever known." He whispered gently.

"It was the only kiss I have ever known" she replied.

She was enjoying being near him. She closed her eyes for a moment as she inhaled, becoming intoxicated by the smell of his shaving soap and cologne. He knew he had done the right thing, laying his heart on the line, but it had paid off. She was to be his.

"Was everything true what you said?" She asked.

"Yes, I went through some dark days while I was in the military hospital. There were days when I wanted to put a bullet in my own head out of despair; then I would think of how disappointed you would be with me."

"It would have broken my heart," she said, feeling a shiver run through her as his blue eyes looked deep into her brown ones.

His warm breath caressed her ear as he whispered. "Oh Lady Edith, I want to make love to you, but I promise I will behave until we wed."

"I should hope so," she said.

He dropped to one knee and held her hand in his good one.

"Lady Edith Crawley, will you do me the honour of agreeing to become my wife, my Lady Strallan?"

"Yes, my darling." She whispered, "I have been waiting five long years for you to ask me that."

OO

Just after the proposal they drifted back into the library.

Carson came in.

"My Lord, Lady Mary and Lady Sybil are back, with Dr Clarkson."

"Show them in Carson." Robert said gravely.

As they walked in both Edith and Anthony felt the tension, as they prepared to learn Matthew's fate.


	8. Chapter 8 Mary's contrition

**Chapter 8**

You could have heard a pin drop in the library at Downton.

Everyone sat, their bodies tensed rigid with concentration. Tom put his arms around Sybil and Anthony held Edith's hand in his good one.

"It is, as yet, too early to tell if the damage to Matthew's arm and shoulder is permanent." Clarkson said, "He is currently sleeping under sedation, and his mother is with him."

"How is the prognosis?" Violet finally managed to ask.

"To be honest, Lady Grantham, it does not look good, but I have been wrong before, since Matthew recovered his ability to walk and stand."

Anthony looked quizzical so Mary said. "Sir Anthony, Matthew returned from the war with a shadow on his spine and for a time it looked very much like he might never walk again. He tried to push his then fiancée, Lavinia, away, not wanting her to be tied to him."

Anthony swallowed, was this not what he had wrestled with in regard to Edith before he had decided that only she had the right to make that choice for herself, once in possession of all the facts?

"Did she leave him after all?" Anthony asked.

"In the worst possible way," Mary replied, "The Spanish flu took her."

"I'm very sorry."

Mary turned to her father and grandmother.

"I know that you must both be so disappointed in me, after the Kamal Pamuk thing? But no one regrets it more than I, because it allowed me to be placed in the impossible situation I was in. Richard Carlisle held it over me and I really did not want you to find out that way, Papa. I decided that marrying a man I did not, and could not, love was just punishment, but I was already becoming tired of him and the self made man sized chip on his shoulder. Today has set me free, and I have a lot of humble pie to eat and apologies to make. I cannot undo it, but cousin Isobel says that I am not the first woman in my position to have made such a mistake and I know I won't be the last. All I know is that I have probably lost Matthew for good so I now have nothing. Whether his injury is permanent or not, I am prepared to take care of him. I realise that an injured crippled heir may not be what you want, Papa, but I won't let Matthew push me away in the way he did Lavinia, although the final decision must rest with him and hard though it may be I will accept it."

"I have accepted Anthony's proposal," Edith said, "I have seen that it is possible for a man to manage, and he has agreed to help Matthew come to terms with his injury because he can do so from a perspective none of us ever have a hope of understanding. The only difference between them is that it is Matthew's left arm that is injured."

"Good for you," Mary said, She swallowed and looked Anthony full in the eyes for the first time that day. "Sir Anthony, i want to apologise for what I made out edith had said the day of the garden party. I saw that you and Edith were happy and I envied that, things with Matthew were not going well at the time and I suppose I was jealous and acted out of pure spite. I can only ask for your forgiveness."

"You have it, Lady Mary." Anthony said, "We were all different people back then, anyone who claims the war did not change them is either dead or lying."

"I'm sorry I send that letter to the Turkish Ambassador," Edith said, "I regretted it the moment it was posted, but I could not take it back. I was a spoilt bitch then."

"Have we stepped into some parallel universe or something?" Violet asked.

"I don't think it's anything we necessarily need to know about, Mama." Robert said.

Edith was relieved that her father had intervened, but she knew she would probably have to explain to Anthony about the letter at some point, although he would probably dismiss it since it had happened before they had known each other.

"Congratulations Edith, and Anthony." Mary said, "Although I can't help thinking that, but for me, you would have been together long before now."

But Edith shook her head.

"I wasn't ready then, I was still a child. I certainly could not have appreciated Anthony then as I do now, probably because I went through the war with the constant dread of never seeing him again, but I mean to learn to help him. Although his actions today have shown me that actually there is very little he cannot do with only one working arm. But I love him because of his injury, not in spite of it. Anthony gave me the choice to love him, and you must let Matthew do the same."

"Will any of you need to talk to the police?" Cora asked.

"I will have to give evidence against Richard, which will bring me a perverse sort of pleasure, and Matthew if he remembers enough."

"Constable MacBride has said that he will need to talk to Edith and I." Anthony said, "He says he will send a man around to Locksley tomorrow."

"Will he be able to do Richard for attempted murder?" Violet asked hopefully.

"At the moment it looks like deliberate, unlawful wounding." Clarkson said, "There is no evidence he meant to kill Matthew and failed, he would have shot elsewhere on his torso had murder been his intention."

"The Jerry who shot at me aimed to kill," Anthony said, "But that was war, I have no doubt things are perceived differently in peace time. If I hadn't turned my back on him at the crucial moment then I might not be here now."

"Oh don't talk about such things," Edith shivered and Anthony drew her close to him.

"I'm here my darling, I'm alive and he was shot for cowardice because he failed to kill me. I have a duff arm but I have my life and my honour, while he has neither."

"I'll go and see Matthew tomorrow," Mary said. She was shaking. Both Edith and Sybil made a silent vow that, now they both had the men they loved, they would do their utmost to ensure that Mary and Matthew were reunited in love.


	9. Chapter 9 Solidarity between sisters

**Chapter 9**

It was early evening when Anthony said he had to return to Locksley, citing estate business. Edith's face fell, but he pulled her close.

"I'll see you tomorrow, my darling," he whispered, nuzzling her neck affectionately and smiling as he saw the corners of her mouth turn up into a beautiful smile.

"I'm worried about talking to the police," she whispered.

"Just tell them the truth about what we found, what you heard and saw," he replied. "You haven't done anything wrong; you did your best to make Matthew comfortable so right is on our side."

"Won't you get into trouble for threatening him with your revolver?"

"I was preventing his escape." Anthony replied, "I would not have hurt him," he indicated his arm, "I have a gunshot wound myself remember, so it is not something I would wish on anyone else, even lowlife scum like Sir Richard Carlisle."

"He wasn't very nice to you," Edith said, "if you had hurt him, I would not have blamed you."

"True gentlemen do not shoot each other in peacetime." Anthony replied.

Anthony's chauffeur had returned to pick him up, but Edith had promised him they would go out for a long drive the next afternoon, so that they could spend some time together and discuss preliminary wedding plans.

"Until tomorrow my darling." Edith whispered.

"Until tomorrow, my sweet one," he kissed her hand.

OO

Sybil and Tom had gone out for a drive.

Edith wandered into the library. She ran her fingers along some volumes of poetry. Lord Grantham's library was more for show; indeed Edith suspected that some of the exquisite leather-bound first editions had never even been opened. It could not compare to Anthony's library at Locksley, with its roaring fire and well-loved well thumbed volumes.

Violet sat there, drinking tea and leafing through a society magazine.

"I'm sorry Granny, I didn't realise you were in here." Edith said.

"Mary was very upset." Violet said, "Do you think there is any chance for her and Matthew?"

"I really don't know, Granny," Edith sighed, "What Sir Richard said, letting out the Kamal Pamuk business when he knew Matthew would hear him, was very wrong. If he had to find out at all, it should have been Mary's place to tell him."

"I quite agree," Violet said, "Thankfully not all men are like Angel Clare. But there are precious few decent men left."

"Don't I know it!" Edith exclaimed.

"You've landed on your feet this time, Edith." Violet said, "Sir Anthony may not be an extrovert, but he has proved himself more than worthy of you today. I told you that your turn would come."

"You did Granny, and to my shame I did not believe you. But I won't pressure him, because I sense there are things related to his war experience that he is not quite prepared to deal with yet. I would not have appreciated him, had we married five years ago. I did not realise until he turned up this morning, which already seems a lifetime ago after what happened today, just how much I had missed him."

"Or how much you loved him?" Violet said.

"That too," Edith smiled.

"Do you think you can cope with his injury?"

"Of course I can. We will need to be around to prove to Matthew that an injured arm doesn't mean the end, but then he has already faced the prospect he might not walk again and come through that."

"I'm very proud of you, Edith dear."

"Thanks Granny."

OO

Mary was very quiet at dinner. Edith had half expected her sister not to show at all, but Mary was hardly the self-pitying type. Sybil shot Edith a few worried glances, which Edith returned, but no one said anything and they tried to keep the conversation on lighter matters.

Mary retired to her room soon after dinner, despite her sisters' attempts to engage her in group pursuits, such as playing cards or checkers.

Edith was headed for bed herself later on. She had planned to spend the evening thinking about Anthony, and the forthcoming experiences they would share.

She looked forward to going out for a drive the following day. Anthony had been rather surprised when she had said she could drive. She knew that driving must be one thing he would miss.

She heard sobbing, quiet at first and then more anguished. She gently knocked on the door. Sybil was not far behind her as hers and Tom's room was further along the same corridor. Tom had already gone to bed.

"Mary, it's Edith." she whispered, "Sybil's here with me. Can we come in?"

Mary came to the door and opened it a crack,

"Alright, but quickly because I don't want Mama to appear and see I've been crying."

Edith and Sybil went into the room. Mary sat on the bed, wearing her nightgown.

"I've lost him." Mary sobbed. "He will hate and despise me for what I did. Cousin Isobel says I'm not the first lady to make such a mistake."

"You're right, you're not." Edith said.

"I wanted him to know, so he could make up his own mind, but now Richard has spilled the beans."

"Matthew still will make up his own mind." Sybil said.

"I'm scared," Mary whispered, "What if he really doesn't want me? He will have enough to cope with when he realises he has lost the use of his arm."

"Then you will need to convince him that it doesn't matter, that you love him because of the injury." Edith said, "I think I know what I am talking about here."

"But Anthony has had more time to come to terms with and accept his physical limitations." Mary wailed, "Matthew has to accept that Richard shot him because of me, and that is without having to come to term with the Pamuk thing. That's on top of learning that he won't be able to drive and I can't chauffeur him around. At least you can drive, Edith, so Anthony won't have to miss out on that."

"I'm sure Tom could teach you to drive." Sybil said, "After all, he taught Edith and she drives almost as well as him, if not better." Sybil flushed, "Just don't tell him I said that last bit."

"I haven't got the patience." Mary said.

"I didn't think I had it either." Edith said, "But I had the determination to learn."

"You need to think positive." Sybil said, "I realise that's probably difficult right now, but you really won't know until you talk to Matthew."

Edith handed Mary a handkerchief.

"Come on, dry your tears. Sybil and I are right behind you on this. Sometimes love has to be fought for, especially if the man in question means everything to you and you know that you will never love another man while he draws breath."

"Look at the way I had to fight for the right to love and marry Tom," Sybil said, "But I would go through it all again tomorrow if I had to, because I love him so very much."

"If you want Matthew you have to fight for him," Edith said. "If he won't see you tomorrow, well then you go back every day until he agrees just for the sake of peace."

"But wait until tomorrow comes." Sybil said, "Just be who you are, because we know that you love Matthew. You have us behind you, and Tom and Anthony will support us in this."

"Matthew has enough sense to realise that Anthony is the one person who can truly understand." Edith said, "Okay so he was shot in wartime and Matthew was shot out of petty jealousy, but the end result is the same. Don't write him or the situation off until you have to, and hopefully that day will never come."

They left Mary after that. She seemed a lot calmer in herself.

Finally Lady Mary Crawley fell asleep.

After all, tomorrow was a new challenge.

**Author note: I wanted to write after all tomorrow is another day, but Gone with the Wind had not been filmed at this time, I'm not even sure when it was written so someone would have hauled me over the coals for that. So I paraphrased.**


	10. Maatthew contemplates life

**Chapter 10 **

In the early hours of the following morning the laudanum began to wear off. Matthew Crawley stirred in his bed and suddenly let out an agonised scream as pain tore through him.

Isobel Crawley, who had been dozing in a chair beside her son's bed, jolted awake and held his hand. Matthew was pale and his face was contorted with pain.

Dr Clarkson came in.

"It's alright Matthew," he said,

"I can't move my arm," Matthew sounded delirious, "What the hell happened? I remember the shoot, and Mary having an argument with Carlisle about me and then nothing."

"Sir Richard Carlisle shot you." Dr Clarkson said gently.

"Oh god."

"The police have got him," Isobel said. "Sir Anthony Strallan held him to ransom with his service revolver until Mary could get Cousin Robert and the police."

Matthew winced, both in pain and shock at the revelations he was hearing.

Clarkson was holding a hypodermic syringe.

"I don't want to sleep," Matthew said.

"This isn't laudanum, it's morphine," Clarkson said. He rolled up Matthew's sleeve and injected his arm.

"Why can't I move my arm?" Matthew demanded.

"I have taken the bullet out, but there is considerable damage to your shoulder blade and nerve-endings. It's too early to say as yet, but you might never get the use of your left arm back."

"So I'll be like Sir Anthony Strallan?"

"He manages more than adequately," Clarkson said, "It's his right arm that is damaged."

"Even so." Matthew relaxed as the morphine began to take effect.

"It was freezing yesterday," Matthew rasped, "How did I escape getting hypothermia?"

"Lady Edith covered you with her coat and shawl to try and stop the bleeding," Clarkson said.

"Mother, you must offer Edith some money to get her coat cleaned." Matthew said.

"Of course I will."

"Is Mary alright? I can't remember all the details, just that Carlisle was saying some really foul stuff about her, but I don't know if I imagined it or not."

"You didn't imagine it, no." Isobel said, "But you need to rest."

"I love Mary," Matthew whispered, "I always have. She should not have been marrying him, but I guess she was making do because I had Lavinia. But if he was blackmailing her into marriage, well that is despicable."

Isobel held Matthew's hand.

"She never stopped loving you, but she is worried because she thinks you will despise her."

"She's far from being the first woman to make a mistake like that, and I did not know her then. How can I despise her? She has been there for me, even when I tried to push Lavinia away when I thought I would never walk again."

"You need to tell Lady Mary that." Dr Clarkson said, "And I assure you, as will Sir Anthony Strallan, that you can live and manage with an injury like yours."

"I can't see the Dowager Countess accepting that her son's heir is somehow physically imperfect." Matthew curled his lip.

"Well, given the acute absence of fit and healthy young men, excepting those who shirked their moral obligation, she hasn't much choice in the matter." Isobel said.

OO

Mary was very quiet at breakfast that morning. Robert had gone into York to see Murray about Bates' trial and Cora had already eaten so the sisters were alone, apart from Tom.

Sybil squeezed Mary's hand.

"It will be alright." She said.

"What if he refuses to see me? Then what do I do?" Mary said.

"You won't know until you ask," Edith said gently, "I'm going to see Anthony, would you like me to bring him over? He is the only one with the slightest idea of what Matthew is going through. We can't even begin to Imagine, and Anthony said that he will do what he can to help."

"Thank you," Mary nodded.

Sybil excused herself to go to the bathroom.

Mary clasped Edith's hand.

"I am so sorry for the way I have treated you in the past, Edith. I don't deserve your help or support. More than anything I am so sorry for what I did that day at the garden party."

"What's past is past." Edith said. "I know what you are going through can't be easy, but I want to help you."

Mary hugged her sister.

"I am so very afraid Matthew will not want to see me."

"You won't know, unless you try." Edith said.

OO

Edith drove Mary & Sybil to the hospital. Tom stayed behind to write to some relatives in Ireland.

"I'll bring Sir Anthony over later, but phone me at Locksley if you need us before then."

"Thanks" Mary said.

Once she had dropped her sisters off, Edith turned the car round and set out for Locksley, her heart pounding at the prospect of seeing Anthony again.

OO

Mary & Sybil walked through the corridors of Downton cottage hospital. The place smelt faintly of carbolic soap and disinfectant.

They found Dr Clarkson in his office studying some x-rays.

"Ah Lady Mary, Mr Crawley is having breakfast at present."

"How did he take the news about his arm?"

"With stoical acceptance. He isn't happy about it, but he realises he hasn't a lot of choice."

"Will he see me?"

"I can't see any reason why not. He is aware of what Carlisle said. But go easy on him, Lady Mary. It's not long since the laudanum wore off, so I have given him pain relief, but he may well still be a little confused. Mrs Crawley sat by his side all night."

"Are those his x-rays?" Sybil asked.

Clarkson shook his head.

Mary made her way along the corridor and paused outside Matthew's room.


	11. Chapter 11 Love & truth

**Chapter 11**

Isobel came out of the room.

"Mary." She said.

"Will he see me?"

"He hasn't said he won't." Isobel said, "Just bear in mind he was sedated yesterday, and now he is on morphine."

"Is the pain bad?"

"You didn't hear him this morning." Isobel said.

Isobel went to get herself a cup of coffee and Mary went into the room.

Matthew smiled at her.

"Mary, it's good to see you." The smile at least seemed genuine.

"It's good to see you too." She restrained herself from rushing to his side, although instinct told her that that was what she wanted to do.

"How are you managing?" she asked, almost kicking herself because it was probably a stupid question.

"Alright, I have dropped a few things because I keep forgetting I can't move my arm or hand. It will take some getting used to. Dr Clarkson does not think I will ever be able to use it again, but he has been wrong before." Matthew's gaze went to his legs which were concealed beneath the bed linen. "Before he gave me morphine the pain was terrible, agonising. It's surprising how a limb that doesn't work can cause so much physical pain."

"Not to mention the pain I must have caused you." Mary turned away, lest he see the tears pricking her eyes.

"You haven't caused me any pain, Mary. You were standing up to him."

"No, I meant what he said. You must be so disappointed in me."

"Mary, it happened before we knew each other and you aren't the first woman to make such a mistake, nor will you be the last. I could never despise you and I have no right to judge you."

"I just feel so ashamed. I thought that by marrying him, by sacrificing my happiness I could make it go away, but he will make it public now and, even if he doesn't, then the story will always be out there."

"Please don't be ashamed, Mary. Come here."

She moved closer and he put his right arm around her.

"Mary, you're free now. You're no longer under any obligation to marry him. Lavinia is dead, and she would want me to be happy, although I don't feel I deserve to be after breaking her heart."

"I love you, Matthew." Mary breathed. "I think i have loved you for longer than I even knew."

He reached for her hand.

"Mary, I have always loved you so very much. Lavinia was a sweet girl and she loved me, but I know now I was just making do because I had lost you through my own stupidity." He looked into her eyes and she held his hand in turn.

"We've got more luggage than the porters at King's Cross." Mary sighed, "Please don't bring me to that point again unless you mean it. Besides, I'm worried that the late Mr Pamuk will resurrect himself anytime we argue, and we will because that is what we're like. Both strong willed."

"I pushed Lavinia away when I thought I wouldn't walk again," Matthew said, "But I can't pretend this," he indicated his useless left arm, "will be easy to live with. If you can't live with it, Mary, then please tell me now."

"Edith is marrying Sir Anthony Strallan," Mary said, "Mind you she is possessed of a fortitude and strength of mind I will never have. I went to pieces yesterday. Thankfully Edith and Anthony were there to help out. I want to be with you, Matthew, no matter what physical condition you are in."

"I want to be with you too, Mary," he whispered, "That is all I have ever really wanted."

"It's what I want too," she whispered back.

"I can't ask you properly at the moment, but Lady Mary Crawley, will you do me the greatest honour of agreeing to be my wife?"

"Yes," she breathed, "You bet I will."

OO

Anthony's butler showed Edith into the library, where Anthony was doing the Times crossword. He asked for tea.

"How are you, my sweet one?" he asked her.

"I'm fine, Mary is at the hospital. I dropped her and Sybil off on my way here. She is worried that Matthew won't want to see her."

"I can come and talk to him. I understand what he will be going through after all."

"That might be a big help. Mind you, he has already faced the knowledge that he might never walk again, thankfully that proved ungrounded."

Anthony drew Edith to him with his good arm and she moaned softly, enjoying the sensation of being close to his warm body.

"I love you, Lady Edith," he whispered softly.

"I love you too, you were my hero yesterday."

They drank their tea.

"I look forward to being your wife," she whispered.

"When I came back from the war, I was having terrible nightmares and I was in such a mess physically and emotionally. I thought my life was over. I wanted to see you, but I feared you had found someone else. After all, I never gave you reason to wait for me. But yesterday you helped me prove that I was useful again, and that you loved me. You gave me back my life."

"You are very special to me, Anthony." Edith said.

"Well, if I can help Matthew in any way then my experiences won't have been entirely in vain." Anthony said.

"I think you are the only person who can, because you have been through the same thing. Mary, Sybil and I can't even begin to understand."

"We'll go and see him later, let Lady Mary have some time with him first, I would appreciate you sharing lunch with me, my darling."

"I would be delighted."

Lunch was a deliciously nourishing lamb broth with crusty bread and butter, followed by apple and cinnamon tart with cream.

"I'm in danger of not wanting dinner after that." Edith said.

"You have a smear of butter on your top lip." Anthony whispered as he leaned close and his lips gently brushed hers. The resulting kiss was tender and left them both trembling.

They drove to the cottage hospital later that afternoon.


	12. Anthony lends a helping hand

**Chapter 12**

Mary was just coming out of Matthew's room when Edith and Anthony approached.

"How did it go?" Edith asked.

"Alright," Mary was coy.

"Only alright?" Edith raised an eyebrow.

Mary's smile was infectious.

"He told me he had always loved me, and he asked me to marry him. Naturally I said yes."

Edith threw her arms around her sister.

"Don't tell anyone yet though, Matthew and I are going to announce the engagement when he gets out of here."

"Mum's the word." Edith said.

"Congratulations Lady Mary." Anthony said.

"Thank you, Sir Anthony." Mary embraced him as well, which took him by surprise.

"We'll see you at dinner." Edith said, as she pushed open the door to Matthew's room.

OO

"It's good to see you, Edith, Sir Anthony." Matthew said. "Thank you so much for what you did yesterday."

"It had to be done." Anthony said, "I wasn't about to let a lowlife like him get away. Congratulations by the way, we just saw Lady Mary."

"I should never have let her go." Matthew sighed, "If I'd known what Carlisle would try and trap her into..."

"If it hadn't been him, it would have been someone else." Anthony said, "There is no shortage of his ilk out there, looking to prey on people."

"You sound like you have experience of his type." Matthew said.

"When she was a foolish young girl my late wife wrote a serious of rather indiscreet letters to a young man of whom she was enamoured." Anthony replied. "She was in London doing her first season and she met Carlisle. He tried to hold if over her. Then she met me and was honest with me. I confronted Carlisle with the fact that I knew. It rather took the wind out of his sails, I think. Holding him to ransom was a pleasure."

"I would probably have frozen or bled to death without your help, Edith." Matthew said. "Please, let me give you something towards getting your coat cleaned."

"Honestly Matthew, there's no need."

OO

Edith had excused herself to get some tea.

Anthony took a seat beside Matthew's bed.

"So how are you?" He asked.

"Well, I keep knocking things over or dropping them because I forget I can't move my arm. But you wouldn't believe how much a limb that doesn't move can hurt."

"Oh, I can believe it." Anthony said.

"Does it get easier to cope?"

"With time. By far the most difficult aspect of an injury like this is dressing and undressing. I can manage to eat and write okay, it's things like not being able to drive that get to me most."

"I'm going to miss that." Matthew sighed, "At least you will be alright when you and Edith get married because she can drive, Mary can't."

"We'll need to be very patient with our women." Anthony said, "Neither of them have experience of undressing men, we have to teach them how it's done."

"And reinforce with rewards." Matthew grinned.

"Of course," Anthony flushed. "I will have a talk with my valet, he may be able to recommend someone for you. I engaged him because he used to be a nurse so had experience with injuries like ours."

"That would be very helpful, thank you." Matthew said.

"It's easy to get despondent and feel like giving up, I went through enough times when I felt like putting a bullet in my own head," Anthony said, "But somehow the thought of Edith kept me from doing that, I knew it would destroy her if she had known I'd killed myself. You're Lord Grantham's heir so you have a lot to live for, even more now that you have Lady Mary."

"Do you still have nightmares and flashbacks?" Matthew asked.

"Yes," Anthony said, "I would be lying if I said I didn't. They are easier to live with now."

"I find I can't talk to Mary about my experiences. I have tried but I just can't find the words."

"Try writing them down, or writing poetry." Anthony said. "It has helped me a lot. You don't have to show it to anyone if you don't want to, but I find it helps to see it outside of yourself, it doesn't seem nearly as terrifying then."

"Did you ever find out who shot you?" Matthew asked, "I mean, I know very well who shot me, and in some ways that makes it harder to live with."

"I never knew his name." Anthony said. "He was a young cadet in the German military police and he didn't even look old enough to have finished school."

"He probably hadn't." Matthew said.

"No, you're right. By the end the Kaiser was calling up increasingly younger men, most of them little more than boys. I pitied them to be honest. They were deprived of their childhood and forced to grow up far too quickly in a conflict they neither asked for nor understood."

OO

Anthony came for dinner at Downton that night. Edith could tell that neither her father nor grandmother was happy about this, but she did not care. She felt that her father owed Anthony something, since he had prevented Carlisle's escape from the scene. Anthony stayed close to Edith, and kept his good arm around her. Edith felt warm and secure.

Anthony summoned his chauffeur at around ten pm and went outside to say goodnight to his sweet one.

He had told Mary that he may be able to help Matthew find a valet, for which Mary was grateful.

"You will have to learn as well, Mary." Edith teased. "No man is going to want his valet present on his wedding night after all."

"You're a naughty girl, Lady Edith." Anthony said.

Mary went back inside.

"I might have to spank you." Anthony teased.

"Oh please do." Edith laughed, "That would be rather fun."

OO

When his valet came to undress him for bed that night Anthony asked.

"Perkins, do you know of any young men looking for a position?"

"Are you unhappy with my services, Sir Anthony?"

"Not at all, Perkins, in fact I could not fault you. I was actually thinking of young Mr Crawley. Up until now he has dressed and undressed himself, but that will not be possible now."

"I can't think of anyone off the top of my head, Sir Anthony, but I will make some enquiries."

"Thank you, that's all I ask." Anthony said.

"Will Sir Richard Carlisle get jail tiem for what he did?" Perkins asked.

Anthony shrugged.

"I don't know. Mr Crawley is a solicitor and thinks he probably would not get much more than eighteen months for unlawful wounding. If they could prove attempted murder that might be a different matter, but the likelihood is that Carlisle would have aimed at his heart had that been his intention. We shall just have to wait and see."

And with that, Anthony knew they would have to be content for now.


End file.
